PD and Assertive, dare to make a mistake!

Oleh : Erwin Parengkuan (TALKINC Founder & Facilitator)

You may be confused by the title I made?Try to digest again, the relationship between self-confidence, being an assertive person and daring to make mistakes.This morning when I was jogging, I had planned to write this article, including for my podcast.Originally I wanted to discuss only the issue of assertiveness. The meaning of assertiveness is having the courage to speak without offending other people.Then, while jogging, I reconstructed and digested the meaning of that word, then the result of my thoughts this morning was that someone cannot be assertive if they are not self-confident.Not confident because they are afraid of what will be said, afraid that they might misinterpret it or it could be because you are a closed or introverted person.A Confident person is a person who knows his strengths and weaknesses.The origin of Confidence comes from Self Esteem (a person respects himself and continues to evaluate himself).

Dalam Zoom meeting belum lama ini dengan klien kami, ketika ada sesi tanya jawab, hanya ada 1 orang yang bertanya, sisanya dari 7 orang tersebut hanya diam dan jadi penonton. Setelah meeting selesai, beberapa orang bertanya japri ke team saya beberapa pertanyaan yang harusnya dilontarkan pada saat meeting tadi, tapi mulut mereka tertutup rapat. Contoh tadi hanya sebagian kecil dari banyak interaksi yang terjadi dalam pekerjaan dan kehidupan kita sehari-hari. Bayangkan kalau kebiasaan ini terus dibawa sampai mereka tua, pasif dan seseorang akan kesulitan untuk dealing with their own conditions and circumstanses. So sad! Boro-boro mau Asertif, PD aja enggak, bagaimana mau bertahan hidup di dunia yang makin kejam ini?

You need to realize that not a single human being in this world is born immediately skilled.We are required to be brave, dare to try, dare to fail, dare to be embarrassed, dare to admit ourselves, and dare to rise again.If this is done continuously, of course there will be progressive results from the habits we form.Try once, twice, several times until we find the right formula for all things in our lives, easier said than done?Yes, but you need to get out immediately from your Comfort Zone, never wait, keep on going until you become it!From there you can only talk to Assertif, evaluate what the results are like.In class I often say to participants, take 2 minutes after we talk to evaluate what was good and what was not good.This will be a great learning process for you.

Oh yes, one more thing, if you come from Java, or are educated in Javanese culture, it will certainly have a big influence on the way you communicate.In my opinion, one of the noble values ​​of Javanese philosophy, namely Nrimo (accepting), is honestly irrelevant in the current communication context.The Modern World, the Digital World requires you to dare to express your opinion, not passively but assertively.Thousands of individuals that I meet in my work, when they are Nrimo, they ultimately fail to build relationships with the environment in which they find themselves, which is very unfortunate!Let's start, don't wait until you're old!It's useless.