Influencing Others By Providing Powerful Feedback
As time goes by, humans must lead within their circles. Starting from leading in the kindergarten line, being parents for our kiddo, to leading your team towards the company’s objectives. I don’t believe that someone is born as a leader. You, who are reading this article, can also be a leader. The question is: how much eagerness do you put into it?
Sacrifice for everything you want, or else everything you want will become your sacrifice. One of the things that I have learned until this is how my observation (as I enjoy being a listener) turn into positive feedback for myself and others. However, being judgmental and giving feedback are related.
I found two methods on how to give positive feedback without being judgmental that you can implement.
1. The GROW model by Max Landsberg (For performance reviews)
GOAL
Ensure and believe that we have a common goal and the same direction. Different ways but one direction.
REALITY
You must listen and fully understand the challenges people face in achieving the goal. Remember to ask the question, ‘Do you think/feel…?’ instead of ‘I think…
OPTION
Asking for their opinion to get a genuine answer while avoiding disagreement reactions. At this time, we are trying to read carefully and identify what the problem is, and then provide other options to achieve the goal.
WILL
The people will not agree to the new option if there’s no benefit for them or if it’s forced. An inspirational conversation needs to be built so that people trust and believe in the option.
2. Feedback Sandwich
Start with a compliment.
Always express gratitude and appreciation by giving positive feedback on what they did. Small compliments can make people feel appreciated.
Present positive options. Afterward, ask for their opinion on what they did and request permission to share your point of view and perspectives of others.
Positive closing. Conclude your feedback by motivating and encouraging them
In practical terms, I use a combination of these methods. The GROW method is what I used to use when I was in a corporate setting, providing feedback in professional situations such as performance reviews for my Sales/RM Team. However, the feedback sandwich is something I utilize in every situation, including when I am facilitating. Offering compliments or positive comments to people can increase endorphin levels. Comments like ‘I like your smile,’ ‘I like your color blazer,’ or ‘How did you get those unique sneakers?’ are the kinds of remarks that can prompt someone to engage in conversation with you and feel appreciated.
Sometimes, differences or conflicts arise from misunderstandings, especially when we don’t know people well. A personal touch is necessary to understand people’s thoughts and feelings. This is what makes us unique, intelligent human beings rather than artificial entities.
However, providing feedback to others is essential for the betterment of all of us in a positive way, and avoiding causing pain to others. So, are you still willing to give painful feedback to others?
Written by Fernando Edo
Edited by Alyezca Disya
